::02:12:09::

::: Yesterday's Babe :::

Even though I am not prepared;
even though I cannot, I will not
ever recover from that which was
absolutely and inevitably expected
as you drew your first breath.

Your preordained emancipation,
the severe and utter separation
of our once completely intertwined lives.

River of salt,
so foreign to me;
this unfamiliar, detested taste
arrived unbidden, uninvited;
and remains, unwelcome.

These violently treacherous waters
hurl me to their surface
exposing the damage
your abrupt,
long anticipated
departure has wrought
upon this sadly inadequate vessel.

I barely have the strength these days
to keep it submerged, to stuff it down
where it flows free, undetected
by anyone's radar
overtaking completely my own.

I grieve alone
as mothers everywhere must,
watching helplessly as
the frighteningly glorious flight
of yesterday's babe
casts long, dark shadows over
the thousands of yesterdays
when we were their mountains.

So blissfully unaware
of our rapid,
hurtling decline
toward obsolescence --
disappearing like smoke within their eyes.

Fly high, fly far, fly fast
as you must, as you should,
as I always wanted you to --
just not today.

All I would ask of you now
is that you would remember me fondly
for that which I did that was right --
forgiving me that which I did that was not.

M. Keller 2007

Written by: ~ Kelly Mars