A stray to this household yet we bare the same last name
Confused on the apparent, I evade truth by pushing it away
Just wanting to be held, cradled even, without a doubt lingering in my mind
A dark figure that is of my loves seems clear yet hazy and hard to find
Giving him, pouring onto him, every bit of my soul
Hoping, wishing, dreaming that maybe a better chapter would unfold
So I could be eager enough to keep reading, hungry enough to keep feeding
Stronger enough to keep giving, barely human enough but keep bleeding
Aches to my heart long for a cure only he can prescribe
My all doesn’t seem to be enough no matter how much I try
So I keep trying.
Trying to show him, trying to give him the benefit of the wrong
Yet all the signs around me tell me that I should be moving on
I can’t. A girl with her heart on his sleeve
Yet I hold a hardened face hoping he doesn’t leave
I know I can do better, those I encounter tell me so
Yet I continue to fall for the same john doe
Let me know or let me go
I’m confused and alone.